Humor

I love clouds but what happens when they become full?

Clouds are very popular these days but I am most happy with them when I am sitting in a plane above a bunch of them.

These types of clouds always work the way they’re supposed to and I’ve never read a bad review on them, either.

These types of clouds don’t store any digital data of any kind. My photos aren’t there. Neither are my documents. My movie clips have never resided there.

Another thing about natural clouds is they don’t ever get badmouthed like digital ones do. I believe we are all users of this great big cloud whenever we rise each day. If we are alive, we look to the sky and clouds for inspiration and feeling.

If we have big things planned on any given day, a lack of clouds in the sky may portend a fortuitous ending to the day’s events. At least, that’s how Hollywood and the music industry portrays it.

“How’s it going, Bob?”

Nothing but blue skies, Jim, nothing but blue skies.”

“In fact, my friend, there’s not a cloud in the sky.”

I used to like it when it was partly cloudy outside. I remember when optimists used to correct me when I characterized the day’s weather and skies this way.

“Bob, Bob, Bob. It’s partly sun-ny. Sun-ny! Don’t be such a downer, man. What am I going to do with you Bobert?”

Since I don’t discriminate against digital clouds of any kind, I use multiple cloud services. They all have their pros and cons. I will refrain from reviewing any of the cloud services here today because I want your heads out of the clouds and focused here. I also want you maintaining consciousness. But if I must give you an insight or two regarding them, I will only go so far as to say my concern is with clouds becoming full.

Tons of metaphors are racing through my brain but the one that takes center stage is when clouds are full. Clouds in the sky that are full, pluming and billowing portending doom in the form of heavy rains make us have umbrellas at the ready. Except for me, that is.

Not too many people in Colorado own umbrellas. Certainly, not the people I knew. It never rained frequently enough. Clouds in the sky were just that—clouds in the sky. There wasn’t any hidden meaning to them. You could usually see them moving, too. They aren’t as stationary as clouds in Kentucky. That’s just my perception, maybe.

But the same people who tell me to think it’s partly sunny out and not partly cloudy (when in my book, it’s actually pretty partly cloudy), have all sorts of opinions for clouds and whether they will bring rain or not.

Natural clouds can bring rain. Digital clouds can get full like natural clouds, but they don’t bring rain. Unless you consider digital rain what happens when you can’t backup or upload any more of your selfies or blogposts to them.

I used to engage in the madness of buying the biggest hard drives I could to prepare for the burgeoning onslaught of data that would inevitably creep its way into the far most corners of my Western Digital, Seagate and Hitachi hard disks. I was fond of saying the biggest hard drives you can afford are like good looks and money: you can never have enough.

Although I came close to filling up a hard drive or two on occasion, I never actually did. Today’s technology cloud services are our modern day digital crack. We sign up for all of them because we never want to risk running out of space for our stuff. But you know we eventually will run out of space and then we’ll end up paying for more.

And I am getting full up here—cloud-wise and elsewhere. I suppose you can believe that is what happens when our digital clouds get full. It rains. Negativity. We have no more places to put our stuff. It makes us sad like rainy days.

This image explaining cloud seeding shows the ...

This image explaining cloud seeding shows the chemical either silver iodine or dry ice being dumped onto the cloud which then becomes a rain shower. The process shown in the upper right is what is happening in the cloud and the process of condensation to the introduced chemicals. Sources for image: (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

When this happens something like cloud seeding comes to mind. People used to “seed” clouds to make it rain in areas where there was extreme drought. It is an idea that has had mixed results.

So what is the equivalent of digital cloud seeding? I don’t know that there is one. If the goal of regular cloud seeding is to make it rain, I would suggest that you don’t want to make digital clouds rain. At least not literally. We don’t want any water in our off-site, offshored servers that host our clouds.

Talk about a partly sunny downer. Since we’ve had partly cloudy fun with metaphors to this point, I will leave you with this thought. Think of clouds like breasts. There’s nothing like the real thing. Real clouds are tangible—you can see them, almost touch and feel them when you are sitting in a plane above them. I was going to say just like breasts, but notice I didn’t. Instead, I am just saying, “Ta ta for now.”

 

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