No, I’m not a Goo Goo Dolls fan. I don’t like blow up dolls of any kind.
But, I think they should come up with a slide to go along with, or substitute for, elevators as a way of exiting high rise buildings in certain circumstances. It could be similar to retractable dome stadiums in that they’d only be available weather permitting. Who wouldn’t love to slide down to street level when getting off work? I know I would. Elevators, no matter how much they update them, just seem antiquated and devoid of fun—like current office building design.
It’s part of making it fun to come to work. I could see companies moving up ten spots at least in the “Top 100 Companies to Work for in Bumspuck” rankings, if only they could tout things like, “Our employees love sliding from work at the end of the day.” “Work for us and you can slide, too.”
When life becomes devoid of fun, that’s when struggles overtake the joy of living. Everyone has struggles expected and not throughout their days. Having fun used to be something only girls were supposed to do. But I say having fun is for everyone.
I’ve come to the conclusion that dogs have fun, and especially so, when you install dog doors for them to come and go out to the yard. Talk about taking your micro breaks for health. Getting out, if only to sun yourself on the top step of the deck stairs, is fun. Dogs don’t have to explain it, either. They just know it’s better than waiting for their owners to take them for a walk or let them out. I suppose it gives them a sense of freedom and independence. Otherwise, as comfortable as an interior home may be, it’s still a prison of sorts if your comings and goings are restricted by others who would own you.
So, people are probably wondering if the slides I speak of would be enclosed. I believe they’d have to be, but they could have air circulating through them from holes built into them. I keep thinking you’d have to have some sort of butt pad to keep from getting a dirty arse. Bum pads for sliders could be available in a variety of shapes and colors so that way your butt is covered and won’t chafe or chap on the way down. Picture a puck gliding on air as on an air hockey table.
Who hasn’t waited for more than one elevator at the end of the work day because the one you were waiting five minutes or more to arrive on your floor is crowded chock full of people like sardines in a can (once the doors open to tease you with a cosmic joke from the universe). “Sorry, Charlie. This one’s full. Maybe next time.”
The slide solves all these problems, not to mention lightening the load on the jobs the elevators are tasked with doing. I understand the slides wouldn’t be for everyone, but talk about shaving off a few minutes when you’re trying to get out of dodge on a Friday afternoon!
We have so many modern electronic gadgets (I hesitate to call them conveniences), yet we have less fun than ever before. Our eyes hurt, we develop repetitive stress injuries from hyper texting and we see all manner of gurus to help us feel better. Whether it’s our chiropractors who crack us back into optimal structural alignment due to sitting in front of our electronic gadgets all day, shots of wheat grass or therapy laced with aromas, we search for remedies so that we might feel better again.
You want to feel better again? Have some fun. Take a ride on a slide. You’ll thank yourself for it while yelling, “Yee-haw” all the way.
This is my vision of a better world for all. Let the slide begin healing us all anew. With the aid of architects who live outside the box, this could happen.
- Review: Taylor Swift ‘American Girl’ (dailytwocents.com)
- Goo Goo Dolls & Shaggy to Co-Headline Boston Fundraiser this February (bostinno.streetwise.co)
- Justin Bieber Surprises Fans With Acoustic Performance (997now.cbslocal.com)