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“For Professionals Going Places”

Image representing LinkedIn as depicted in Cru...

Image via CrunchBase

I’m glad LinkedIn decided to update its mobile app for iPhone. It needed some freshening up.  The new app starts up with a picture of a young girl walking in front of a young man in what looks to be a busy city street intersection. Take away the fact I know it’s LinkedIn’s redesign app face and I think two people going across the street. I suppose they are going places, but in this particular moment they are going across the street, not some place, although they may be; it’s just not clear.

“For People Going Across The Street”

Now there’s an app slogan I can live with in regards to the photo here. It more accurately describes what is going on besides the fact it just sounds more real, too. They’re going across the phreakin’ street! How cool is that LinkedIn users?

English: Signature of George Carlin.

English: Signature of George Carlin. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

The whole redesign for the sake of redesign sometimes gets to me. George Carlin once said in a bit of his that if you stood on a busy corner somewhere and nailed two pieces of wood together, someone would walk up and offer you $1.50 for it.

“Hey, what is that?”

“I don’t know.”

“That’s OK. I’ll give you a buck fifty for it.”

And so it goes.

People will buy anything and you don’t have to sell them too hard these days. Even when they buy something like a car that purports to get incredible gas mileage and they find out it really doesn’t do all that great on gas, they justify their purchase with statements like, “I just like the way the car handles. It’s alright that it doesn’t get as good gas mileage as I thought.”

C’mon man. That totally bothered the dude but instead of buyer’s remorse, he is too proud to admit he was sold into thinking the mileage would be better than it is. So now he is left to make stuff up in order to live with his purchase. He will soon understand saying it handles well is also a big batch of horsepucky.

“Motherscratcher! So, truth be told the handling’s not great, nor is the gas mileage. The seat even sucks in my backside more than I’d like. But hey, it’s got new car smell! Nothing like new car smell, right?”

new car smell

new car smell (Photo credit: seanaes)

Nope, nothing like new car smell that’s for sure.

So I get LinkedIn touts itself as a professional networking service. I think that’s pretty arrogant, not to mention, just plain disrespectful and exclusionary to amateurs. Who’s to say that professionals aren’t amateurs before they are professionals, correct? LinkedIn is also missing out on potential new customers and revenue by only marketing itself to professionals.

Some of my best friends are amateurs.

I used to call myself a “Communications Professional” on LinkedIn. Granted, it does sound better than Communications “Amateur.” But I think a lot of people might not be averse to checking out your profile if you put “Amateur” instead of “Professional” before or after your title, as in:

Richard Weed, Sales Amateur—doesn’t have an entirely bad ring to it after all.

Amateur Landscaper Lorna Dune—again, not going to look away.

Herk U. Leeze, Amateur Animal Trainer—I’m still thinking I might at least click and see what kinds of animals the Herkster has trained.

Count M. Quick, Amateur Certified Public Accountant—for when you and your taxes owed just can’t afford the best.

Mobile App Launch Party attendees line up to h...

Mobile App Launch Party attendees line up to have the pre-release app loaded onto their mobile devices by app developer Jeremy of Spark design. (Photo credit: Desert Rivers Audubon)

Nobody wants to pay more than they have to. And we all want value from our free iPhone apps–or at least some truth:

LinkedIn: The Professional Networking Service for Amateurs and Professionals Who Might Cross The Same Street To Get Somewhere.

I’ve totally missed my calling.

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