Humor

25 reasons to have someone buzz your head this summer

Subject: Buzzcut Photographer: Photographer's ...

Subject: Buzzcut Photographer: Photographer’s Mate 1st Class (NAC) Mark S. Kettenhofen Date: July 1, 1998 Location: United States Naval Academy, Annapolis, Maryland Source: U.S. Navy Office of Information (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

1. It saves on haircuts, that is, if the person buzzing you is giving you the mop chop for free.

2. It keeps you cooler. Today was pretty hot and I can say without hesitation my head feels cool when I’m in the cool basement. And you know what they say about cooler heads prevailing.

3. Cooler heads will prevail.

4. Because “serious” bloggers say the time has come and gone for “top twenty-five anything” blog post lists in the blogging community. Meh.

5. If your wife does the buzzing, you can hear things like, “I don’t think this is set on a No. 1, Bob. Oops, too late now. No need to get the adjustable blade. Oh my. This is a completely different look. Not that it’s bad. There. Done.”

6. Animals like gold fish and hares are no longer intimidated by your hair…even the hair that is on the ground.

Buzz Cut

Buzz Cut (Photo credit: JasonTromm)

7. It “feels” like you are going faster on the downhills when you are riding your bike.

8. Because gray hair is replaced by gray dots.

9. Your bald spot(s) is/are less pronounced.

10. People didn’t know you before the buzz cut and they sure as shite won’t know you afterwards. Revel in your anonymity.

11. Head bands actually stand a fighting chance of absorbing sweat before it drips down the bottom of your forehead and stings your eyes.

12. You look like an 80’s rocker when you wear a head band.

13. People want to rub your head for good luck. No, not that head. C’mon, you know you were thinking it.

14. Your smile really makes your eyes pop after a buzz cut. No, if your eyes are kind of big like mine, they can sometimes appear to be bulging. But, keep smiling. People will think you are up to something.

15. Shuffle down the street with your practically bald, well, yeah, entirely bald head, until someone comes up to you and asks, “Whatsa matter witch you boy!”

Newly commissioned officers celebrate their ne...

Newly commissioned officers celebrate their new positions by throwing their midshipmen covers into the air as part of the U.S. Naval Academy class of 2005 graduation and commissioning ceremony. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

16. Your hats can be tightened up a little now. Or, for those hats that don’t adjust, you can wear that headband under them so they won’t feel so loose.

17. You wear hats more often than before if only to keep from getting a sunburn on da dome.

18. You can get ready for work/school/anything faster without having to mess with your hair.

19. Can’t technically qualify as having a bad hair day.

20. You can finally ride with ALL the windows down without messing up your hair.

21. If your ears are big you’ll appear more Spock-like.

22. Stupid people who didn’t pay much attention to you but who know who you are will think you did something to your appearance but they can’t quite put their finger on it. Nor will you let them.

23. You’ll think you’ll be more careful about bumping your head accidentally since it’ll hurt more without hair protecting at least some of your skull. You would be right about it hurting more.

lauren's buzz cut

lauren’s buzz cut (Photo credit: Runs With Scissors)

24. You’ll still bump your head accidentally just as much. This isn’t technically a reason to buzz cut or shave your head, but I feel you should be aware.

25. You’ll look and feel fresh and happy. And that is way better than hairy and unkempt. Plus, you’ll want to come up with at least another 10 reasons to buzz your hair off after reading this.

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